Admitting it

Admitting your scared of something is hard. Not just to others....it is harder to admit it to yourself. I'm scared! What if it changes all the work we have done to get to this point? It could happen.

My step-daughter and her mother haven't talked since August. They are having dinner together this week. And...I am scared. What if her mother doesn't live up to her expectations and hurts her even more? What if she tries to fly back into her life and control things again? I think it is very important for Alexys to have a relationship with her mother. I have always said that. And, I was and still am totally for her reaching out to her mother. But Alexys wants to have a relationship on her terms. That's not how it is going to be and I hope she is ready for that. You NEVER get what you want out of a relationship. Sometime you get more...but usually you get less. I'll always be here for her. But this is something I can not fix for her. I know her mom doesn't like how I parent. But I do hope that she is mature enough to take that up with her father and not bad mouth me to Alexys. I don't see Alexys taking well to that. Like it or not...I've been her only mother for the past 7 months and have ALWAYS treated her like one of my children since she has been in my life. Step parenting is hard. I tell Alexys I love her with all my heart but I hope she never has to go through what I've had to.